it's the end of the day as i know it...

lately, the word passion has come up a lot in conversation... a couple of weeks ago, friend jeff asked, "what are you passionate about?" - it was kind of a question aimed at a group of people.. and as the question made its way to me... well, i just had to say, "i don't know..." and it got me to thinking... "what AM i passionate about?" - what makes my heart skip a beat because i'm so excited? it's time for a little dictionary.com

passion - n.

1. A powerful emotion, such as love, joy, hatred, or anger.
2a. Ardent love.
b. Strong sexual desire; lust.
c. The object of such love or desire.
3a. Boundless enthusiasm: His skills as a player don't quite match his passion for the game.
b. The object of such enthusiasm: Soccer is her passion.
4. An abandoned display of emotion, especially of anger: He's been known to fly into a passion without warning.
5a. The sufferings of Jesus in the period following the Last Supper and including the Crucifixion, as related in the New Testament.
b. A narrative, musical setting, or pictorial representation of Jesus's sufferings.

passionate - adj.
1. Capable of, having, or dominated by powerful emotions: a family of passionate personalities.
2. Wrathful by temperament; choleric.
3. Marked by strong sexual desire; amorous or lustful.
4. Showing or expressing strong emotion; ardent: a passionate speech against injustice.
5. Arising from or marked by passion: a teacher who is passionate about her subject.

okay, i'll exclude some of the definitions, because what i'm trying to figure out is - what are the things that cause boundless enthusiasm for me? what arises passion from within me... to the point that i would die for it?

i've been talking with amy about what her passions are - and it's easy to see passion for ministry in her life... not that ministry isn't my "passion" - but it's what she'll be doing forever... and i'm in a job that doesn't really "count" as ministry... and i do volunteer ministry - but am i passionate about it? and... is it wrong to be doing things you're not "passionate" about - for instance... i love my job... it's incredible... i don't know that i'm passionate about it, but i enjoy it a lot... i guess i have a hard time assigning that adjective to things - because it's such a strong word... so am i really passionate about things and i just don't know... wouldn't i know?

i wasn't really headed anywhere with this particular discussion - just random things that hit me today as i was thinking about it... jeff is still waiting for an answer and amy is seeking earnestly a place to be able to live out her passion for ministry... which i think is incredible, by the way... there's probably no harder spot to be in, i'd think, than to know what your passion is - what your heart is - and not be able to live it out... to have purpose, but no place...

but for me... is it weird not to know? i feel like it's one of those things that would stand out in my mind... i would know... why don't i know?

so, now, i'm about to leave work with my thoughts... i am going to go down the hall and see if i can catch my friends of the california gang and hang out with them (fun friends from san francisco up to take a class...)

i can't believe it's only thursday... i'm ready for the weekend!